Hey Reader,
This weekend, Leanne and I are celebrating 18 years of life together.
If our marriage were a person, it would be able to vote this year. But don’t worry, we’re NOT digging into politics today.
PHEW! 😅
Anyway, at 40 years old, it’s a little weird to think that I’ve been married for almost half my life.
In that time I’ve learned countless lessons like putting the peanut butter on a PB&J before the jelly, and washing the outside of a pan and not just the inside.
But, instead of rambling on and sharing my tips, I thought it’d be fun to reach out to some other dads and get their take.
Here’s what I asked them:
What tidbit of marriage advice do you share most often?
And here is what they said:
I regularly ask my wife “How can I make this week better or less stressful for you?” And she does the same for me. It allows us space to share things that are bothering us or areas we may need support with life, kids, work, etc. It’s so simple yet powerful! — Justin M.
Embrace being alone together. Read in the same room quietly. Go for long walks without speaking. Sip patio drinks together in silence. Being comfortable in those moments goes a long way toward building a loving and lasting marriage. — Mike V.
The best marriages are ones where two people wake up every day and ask “What can I do to serve them today”? The word serve is key. If both are doing that, it’s hard to screw it up. —Nick T.
Have lots of sex. —Dustin S.
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.” - Proverbs 16:9. When I’ve been able to seek the wisdom in the unfolding of life versus trying to exhibit some form of control over it, there’s a natural peace and alignment that happens for me. Doesn’t make things easier to swallow, but it does provide opportunities for me to grow, learn, and perhaps course correct in the future. —Brace C.
It’s better to be kind than be right. I think this has been a really helpful mental script for me. I spent a lot of early years of our marriage and relationship on trying to be right, often at the detriment of being unkind. Focusing on being kind more than being right is a helpful frame of mind in marriage. —Heath P.
Marriage is the hardest and most rewarding work you will ever do. Being consistent in life, especially in nurturing your marriage is key to a happy one. Always keep growing. —Matthew S.
Marriage is hard, especially when you have kids and someone’s ill and no one got enough sleep last night, so always approach each other in the spirit of compassion. —Craig N.
Everyone comes into a marriage with their own conceptions of how to do things, so you and your wife will have to sort through how to to things
together. This will become obvious when you do your first budget together… The first conversations about everything in a marriage can be tough, but realize that both of you are figuring out how the other person is.
Even if you have lived together before getting married, the conversations take on a new level of meaning because you have vowed to be together the REST OF YOUR LIFE! So, work through the conversations with an open stance; the conversations get easier. —Nathan B.
I'm gonna go ahead and brag on these guys... that’s some good stuff!
WISDOM
“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”― Albert Einstein
How would your job, your family, or even just the average day feel different if you considered everything a miracle?
RECOMMENDED
I really like giving gifts, but also feel like I'm terrible at it.
Thankfully, I sometimes stumble across an Instagram ad that catches my eye and is actually kind of cool.
Enter Starrymaps.
This is a constellation map of the night sky for a given place on a specific date and time. Several years ago, I had one made for Leanne that is for the night of our wedding and she loved it.
Wherever you’re at in your marriage journey, whether you want to get married, are newlyweds, or are veterans like us, I wish you all the best in your life together and hope you both continue to grow and learn.
Move your body.
Clear your mind.
Repeat.
Keep up the good work!
-KC
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Gym Dad, Coffee Drinker, LEGO collector
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Q: How do moths swim?
A: Using the butterfly stroke.