What’s the last lesson you learned as a dad?
Reframing worry matters.
You can be supportive without stagnating them. You can be concerned for their well-being without living in worry. You can let go without losing them.
I didn't understand that for a long time. I thought concern and worry were the same thing, and that loosening my grip meant loosening the bond.
My kids are 21 and 16 now, and I've hit the part where I get to watch the results of the parenting I did when they were small, and at the same time figure out what fatherhood is supposed to be for them now.
Those are two different jobs, and they're happening at once.
All in all, it doesn't get easier. It just gets different.
QUOTABLE
"If you dig it, do it. If you really dig it, do it twice."
— Jim Croce
Everybody points to "Time in a Bottle" when they talk about Croce and time. For me it's "I Got a Name."
That one isn't about holding onto time. It's about legacy. About carrying something forward and trying to live up to it. I think about that as a dad. I'm trying to live up to the name, and I hope my kids never have to carry it the way I have.
This is the kind of advice I wish I'd gotten from my own father, though I don't blame him for not giving it. He grew up in a different time, with a different kind of father himself.
So when I hear that line from Croce, I hear all of his songs at once. But mainly "I Got a Name."
MIKE RECOMMENDS
I’m a fan of cooking appliances; anything I can have to make cooking healthy dinners with less friction is a win for me.
I’ve got an Anova sous vide machine, an InstantPot, a Ninja Foodi Air Fryer – and that’s only the big three.
These appliances give me the flexibility and freedom to do the cooking 3-4 times per week for my family and fulfill my role in my business as well… all without skipping a beat.
SHAMELESS PLUG
Hey — I'm Mike 👋
I've got a book coming called Productiveness. It's built on the idea that productivity, the industrial-era version, was never really the point. Productiveness is the older word and the better one. It's about being fully present in your life, not just efficient in your work.
The book runs on a handful of principles, and the thing that surprised me is how much they've shaped me as a father, not just as someone who writes about time for a living. Grace, for letting my kids be works in progress the way I'm still one myself. Cadence, for showing up at the right rhythm instead of all at once. Trust, which is the one I've had to grow into most as they've gotten older. I didn't set out to write a parenting book. But the more honest I got about what actually works, the more these started showing up at the dinner table and not just the desk.
If any of that resonates, you can sign up here to get updates and learn more as the release date draws near.
FROM KC:
Special thanks to Mike for today's issue!
And thank YOU for supporting the 30 Days of Dads series.
If you enjoyed this issue, please:
- Forward it to a friend, or
- Send them to 30DaysofDads.com.
And remember...
Move your body.
Clear your mind.
Repeat.
Keep up the good work!
-KC
DAD JOKE 🔌
Q: Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
A: He took a day off.
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